How to Make Your Holidays Truly Sweet - Part 3

Do the holidays cause you some anxiety? I’ve been on a quest to get and share ideas for making holidays sweet and stress-free as a Christian family. No matter what your family dynamic or season of life, here are a few more tips for making your holiday truly sweet.

AND – if you’d love some new recipes and sweet ideas, grab my Cozy Holidays e-book and get ready to celebrate this season. 🙂

Let’s start with some meal planning/prep – but don’t tune out if you’re not a cook or host. First: someday you’ll be there even if you’re not now. Second, if you’re not there, you can bless the socks of of someone by being proactive and helping with the meal. Third, after these, I’m going to share some take-home ideas you can use whether you cook or not, to set a tone in your day (and especially at the holidays) that puts living the #invitinglife at the forefront. It helps you get your heart and mind in the place to experience God’s grace and pour it out to others – whether you’re actually “hosting” in a traditional way, or not!

Take Advantage of Meal Planning Tips for a sweet holiday:

Do what you can in advance. (Check out the Thanksgiving meal plans from Downshiftology and Half Baked Harvest)
- Try making a breakfast in advance (my very favorite breakfast ideas are here!) so you can start your day well-nourished.
Set your table and your serving dishes a day or two ahead. I got this tip from my mom-in-law, but a number of people shared it online as well. I put a small note in each dish with what it will hold. I also put the shelf-stable ingredients right in the dish so I can see at a glance what I’ve got and have less to grab when I’m preparing dishes.
Use Shortcuts. A turkey roaster , a smoker, an Instant Pot or slow cooker can be your best friends for saving oven space or keeping your kitchen from being too hot. One friend told me she uses her turkey roaster (this one has great reviews on Amazon) year round. She puts it on her patio in the summer with dishes like lasagne, to make it easier to serve guests and keep her kitchen cool. Other shortcuts: you can freeze unbaked muffins or rolls (or maybe your family prefers the pre-made take-and-bake rolls… though this is something I love so I often make scratch anyway!) and even find high-quality side dishes pre-made. If from-scratch doesn’t matter to you, save your time and energy for people-ing!
Invite others to bake and bring. Maybe there are family members who have specialty recipes… one year my daughter-in-law’s dad made most of the sides because he loves to cook! It can also be super helpful to welcome someone else to bring something as simple as a bagged salad, ice, or drinks. It’s a blessing to you, but it also blesses the person who gets to participate.

Go even a little bit further – these are some things you can do all year long to help you set a peaceful tone for gatherings in your home or away.

Set the Mood – even for you!

Music is my total mood setter whether I’m studying, writing, or making a meal. I love to use essential oils for a calming mood whether I’m cooking or hosting. Some of my favorite essential oil blends are:

peppermint and lemon and vanilla for brightness
cinnamon, pine and orange for warm and cozy
lavender, eucalyptus and sometimes lemon for calm energy

One online friend said: “The struggle I have with my lists is that if I forget something or fall behind, I can feel like a failure, but I’m learning to make mid course corrections and just tweak things a bit in order to get it all done while finding joy in doing it all. If I’m lacking joy, something’s wrong… and it is a major red flag to make some adjustments.” She’s right! It might be that we need quiet time with the Lord, a healthy snack or glass of water, or just a little break in the day. Which leads to our next tip…

Give grace – to you and everyone else!

Holidays can be wonderful but if our expectations overrule our joy, they’re counterproductive. In Episode 26, we talked about the importance of starting your day in prayer, Bible & journal. Write a post-it if you need to, and put it where you’ll see it as you move through your day. For a few weeks this has been on my bathroom mirror and in my planner: “By God’s grace, I will establish a rhythm of work and rest that influences my home with peace, empowers movement with my mind and body, and glorifies my Father by a joyful, loving, fearless countenance.” Choose a way to remind yourself to show yourself, and those you love, grace this holiday season.

Stick to your schedule.

One young momma friend reminded me that missed naps and bedtimes can make it more difficult for littles to hang in there. Show up a little late or leave a little early if you need to, to make the best of holiday gatherings for your kiddos. (This goes for yourself, too!) When our kids were little, we snagged Christmas eve evening and Christmas morning for ourselves. A Christmas Eve service was a precious gift, and afterward we came home to appetizers or fondue and Christmas jammies. We didn’t do any of the grandparent visits until after a slow morning of reading the Christmas story in Luke, and opening gifts with a leisurely late breakfast. If you have a rhythm that works for you and your health, it’s ok to work to keep that somewhat intact over celebrations. However, it’s also a great idea to…

Be flexible.

I was reminded by a mom of adults a few years ahead of me, “Once you have married kids, don’t compete. Don’t demand.” The holidays will inevitably bring the overlap of multiple family traditions, schedules, and desires. If you can, keep inviting, and be willing to stretch a little! Do your best to offer a gracious environment and let everyone work it out… and don’t stress about their issues.

Image via Pexels from Karolina Grabowska

Take a break.

No matter what season you’re in, give yourself a pause. Go for a walk after the meal. If you’re hosting, it’s ok to build in some quiet – we try to have a “do it yourself” option for guests for morning coffee and even breakfast. If you’re the one with little kids, build in some play time or a craft to take a break from all the grown-up-ing! (Episode 17: The Power of Pause!)

Choose your traditions with intention.

In our family, the Jesse Tree has been a meaningful tradition. But ham versus turkey is a no-brainer in our home for most years; I’d FAR rather enjoy ham for our Thanksgiving or Christmas! My friend Janine and her family always read The Night Before Christmas and Luke 2 on Christmas. But if they’ll be with family, they just take the tradition on the road! I love these wise words from my friend Tabitha: “The importance of “realizing that hosting is more about the beauty of community and togetherness than it is about the beauty of our home.” Here’s your reminder that our homes usually reflect the attitude of our hearts — they go hand in hand! So it’s ok to incorporate one or two traditions that honor what’s most important to you and let the rest go.

Streamline.

Look at your calendar – is there one thing you can bow out of? My young adult friends, often school or work commitments press into your schedule. It’s ok to say no to something to make space for yourself. When it comes to gifts – big families – what if you draw names or choose a family gift or an experience as the gift? One listener told me they combine celebrating and helping every year when they eat turkey and decorate with Grandma for Christmas. Maybe you’re like Cheryl, who struggles with societal expectations and no money – feeling the pressure of expectations to society expects you to “give gifts to everyone and anyone, throw parties, send cards, bake cookies, prepare meals, donate to charity, go on vacation, decorate your house. . . “ I hear you, Cheryl. I’m giving each of us permission to commit to doing just those things we feel convicted will matter for investing in relationships with a kingdom perspective (we talked about being kingdom minded in Episode 9: Be Kingdom-Minded)… but hearing Cheryl’s honest struggle also was a huge reminder that we don’t always know the struggles others are going through at the holidays. So let’s pray to:

Be mindful of where others are.

Is there someone alone in your church family? One young momma friend mentioned how hard it is for her having to eat alone while nursing a baby in another room during celebrations. Well, for starters – just no! Every mom should feel welcome and safe to nourish her babies at family gatherings. And secondly, how can we encourage someone in young mothering days? Maybe we could set up a rest area for napping, a special table with kiddo activities, or a comfy chair for nursing a little one 🙂 Andrea mentioned how hard it is at the holidays, missing her mom. Could we write a special note you can write or give a hug and a prayer for the friend or family member who’s struggling this holiday season? Rachel shared that it’s hard to go through the holidays longing for a baby. We may never know what someone is going through, but if we’re paying attention, we might have the opportunity to connect more deeply and bless that person! How do we do that? We ask all the questions and get to the heart of a person (see Episode 20: Ask Good Questions).

In episode 28, we’ll share some scripture and pray in real-time to help each one of us pause and set our hearts on things above. In the mean-time, here’s some truth for us to meditate on as we prepare our hearts and homes for making holidays sweet and stress-free as a Christian family.

“If then you have been raised with Christ, seek the things that are above, where Christ is, seated at the right hand of God. Set your minds on things that are above, not on things that are on earth. For you have died, and your life is hidden with Christ in God.” – Colossians 3:1-3